‘Twilight’ Parody Is A Nightmare (I agree!!)

The 80-minute nightmare “Vampire’s Suck,” which is meant to be a satirical jab at the ultra-popular “Twilight Saga,” is instead an alarming example of how to make a really bad movie.

Writers and directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer (the team responsible for the “Scary Movie” series) present a remarkably un-funny re-tooling of angst-ridden teenagers, unrequited love and vampires.

There is an indisputable following from volumes of Twi-fans who are responsible for making lucrative cult icons out the characters inspired from Stephenie Meyer’s series of books, so the temptation to cash in with a parody is obvious.

With all the room to find plenty of comedy in the brooding and humorless love triangle between Bella, Edward and Jacob, Friedberg and Seltzer missed nearly every opportunity for wit for the sake of predictable sight gags and unrelated pop culture references.

Despite the dreadful script, the film has one bright spot. That’s the casting of Jenn Proske, who has the uncanny ability to mimic the physical tics and idiosyncrasies of Kristen Stewart’s character Bella in the Twilight films.

While it’s hard to tell if Proske can actually act like someone other than her version of Stewart, odds are she will get a second chance to showcase her skills, if only as a reward for surviving this movie.

In two weeks at the box-office, however, “Vampire’s Suck” has brought in a total of $27.9 million. That allows Friedberg and Seltzer to blush all the way to the bank as they prepare to make “Scary Movie 5.”

Longtime Valley resident Jennifer Hudson reviews films weekly for the Valley News. (source)

Images: Google